AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!Yes, it snowed today. No one died, nothing exploded but everyone acted like it did. I honestly heard someone compare today to the 7/7 tube bombings on an imaginary richter scale of tragedy/amazement/excitement.
London shut down. It was like the 9th circle of hell mixed with 'The Day After Tomorrow'. But Dennis Quaid didn't come and save me, oh no.
The newsreader on BBC London this morning was almost cuming in her knickers she was so excited, she really wanted to smile. Most of the tube lines had delays and the buses were suspended. The buses were suspended, people. They did weather reports every five minutes. They even brought out some weather people who never get air time, they looked as excited as the Farming Correspondants did during the foot and mouth crisis.
London was brought to it's knees. Once the greatest City in the greatest empire this world has ever seen, reduced to a husk because of snow. Last year I was in Kocise in Slovakia. It's a fucking shit hole, like all of Slovakia (don't believe me? Go on, go. You'll regret it) Anyway the day I was there the city saw 8" of snow in 4 hours, it was a proper blizzard. Everyone was working, and my train was bang on time, no one complained.
No one came to work today. I mean it was snowing, you can't expect people to brave the arctic weather can you? I went in, as did all my colleagues, but we have a newspaper to print tomorrow, so we had to. No one else's job seems to matter in London, so everyone else stayed home. I am sure plenty of people could have come in, no I know they could have, because I did and I even got a seat on the tube. But a good percentage of London work in sales, which doesn't really matter. They were not missed.
Oxford Street was packed with shoppers, too. They braved the arctic weather. Finsbury Park was packed, too. Packed with drunk people playing in the snow. Well, it was mainly mud by 5pm. So they were playing in mud, drunk.
Some wit drew a cock on the front of the car outside my house. Bet they didn't go to work either today.
No comments:
Post a Comment